Today you are two years old. I'm not quite sure how that happened. One minute I'm screaming at your father to get me some f**king batteries for the f**king breast pump or the baby will starve, and the next minute we're in hysterics as you bat your eyelashes and try to con us into letting you watch yet another round of Finding Nemo. Tell me, how did we go from this...
You amaze us every day. At night, after you've gone to sleep, your dad and I take turns reciting the new words and phrases you've learned, starting all of our sentences with, "She said the funniest freakin' thing today..." and talking in high-pitched kiddie voices. To the untrained observer, we sound like morons. But really, we just find your nonstop chatter that adorable.
You've picked up some cute catch-phrases like "Sure," "Let's go, Mommy," and "What're you doin'?" But much to our relief, you have yet to drop the f-bomb, and we're hoping we can stave that off long enough so that Christmas dinner with the grandparents won't suddenly turn awkward when you ask Mommy for more f**king juice, please.
I won't lie. For
But lately? Oh, what a joy you are. You say and do new things every day, and in way, you're giving me a chance to see the world with new eyes. I could sit for hours with you watching a rabbit in our backyard munch on grass, just because the way you squeal, "Bunny's eating GRASS!" makes me wonder how I ever got along without seeing such an amazing event.
And you, my Munchkin. How did we ever get along without you? In a few months, you'll become a big sister. But you will always be our first baby, the gift that turned us into a family. We love you more every day, and there is nothing in this wide world that we wouldn't do for you.
Happy birthday, baby.